Monday, September 19, 2005

My name is Annalisa and I will be your server tonight.

I worked a double today and I'm wired, my brain won't shut off. Maybe I should smoke a bowl. Made some pretty good money today. At least enough to pay my bills, I have yet to make enough to have a little spending money. My gifts cards are coming in very handy when I want to spend money on a cd or new clothes but know I don't have the money in my bank account. Thank you Amy and Virginia!!

I have to admit that I am feeling overwhelmed with serving. It's not hard per say, keep the guests drinks stocked, smile, warm chatter with them, be attentive, all common sense when it comes to being a waitress right? Right. I'm finding it hard to be on my feet all day, but luckily I only work 4 days in a row then I have 3 days off for school. (by the time my work week to begins I feel thankful to get 4 days off of school!! ha!) I can multi-task, that isn't a problem either, at least I don't think it is. It's really hard going from a job that I had mastered into new territory in which I have no experience what-so-ever. I find myself wondering if I'm cut out for this. Maybe I'm better off behind a desk.

But I don't give up. I won't. I'm going to master this job like I do all other jobs I have set before me. In fact, the learning and mastering of skills is what gives me the most pride in jobs. Perhaps everyone fucks up as much as I do. Oh, and I cry, at work. I get so overwhelmed and stressed out that I burst into tears. I can't help it and I have to admit that it embarrasses me. I blame the outbursts on becoming pregnant because I don't remember being like this before I got pregnant. After I've calmed down I wonder what the big deal is. I need to learn a different way to cope with stress. I'm going to talk to my boss tomorrow about all these feelings. (stoopid women and all their damn hormones and emotions.)

I've lost 40 pounds since January. Yoga and being a waitress has really helped me maintain my weight loss and aided in losing more weight! I'm going to try to lost another 10 by the end of the year! Go me! (hell ya I'll encourage myself!)

I'm going to take a bath and try and relax.